Relational Development: Therapeutic Implications of Empathy and Shame

Abstract

A perspective which emphasizes relational development leads to a shift in understanding therapy, which can be thought of as a process through which individuals find ways to bring themselves more fully into relationship. Empathy serves our basic desire for connection and emotional joining. In shame, we experience a loss of empathic attunement. The experience of being shamed thus leaves one feeling disconnected and disempowered. Marginalized groups, in particular, struggle with this form of disempowerment. Shame is also a powerful obstacle to connection in psychotherapy, but an empathic, relational approach in therapy can significantly alter the experience of shame.